Sunday, February 26, 2006

DREADNAUGHT: When ACCIDENTS Happen

Today marked my first-ever "I-HATE-TODAY" day..

It was STUPID to have gotten myself drunk with the Police Corps Party (a political party of sorts i'm affiliated with)

It was even STUPID-er to waltz to the Guam Bar where the circle of friends used to hang out and finding them there, sitting there as well, and getting more DRUNK in the process.

It was the first time I saw HerMan (err..sorry for the sic pun, a her and a man makes one simply a Herma for short) I think I must've gotten googly eyed seeing that coffee-colored skin of hers (again). I commented she's tanned pretty nice...and I'm nto sure if i tactlessly asked whether she has tanlines or something to that effect in the drunken state i was in.

I couldn't remember everything Herma and I talked about. I just remembered her taking my number, her talking about stuff which I think (now sobered) was bothersome to hear..(it involved red thongs and looking at the mirror naked with a man of flabs)

I didn't talk with Spike--maybe subconsciously, I still felt my defenses rise up after the ordeal of being sold out in the whole deal I got involved myself into just recently.

Okay. i remember now.

At the restroom, I was in line. He poked me and asked whether I was okay. I looked up, saw him and made a tight face. I think I gave him a piece of my mind about sincerity and the gall of some people to interpret honest intentions with bollywood plots. I'm not sure he got everything line, hook, bait and sinker.. But I sure got the message across when he said he thinks he knows wot I was driving at and he became guiltily quiet.

Still, I'm a man of civilities. I don't take matters out in the open nor discuss things which I feel were shared in the midst of a vowed secrecy. It's weirder when others easily forgive and forget. Mine's simpler. I forget first then I forgive years after.

Back at the table, when things are nearing the break of day, I offered to bring Spike and his friend Rodman to where it's convenient for them to go home, I think I offered to deliver drunken Spike home to where he lives. They both alighted at the Rotonda Circle.

I feel giddy. More, I felt exhausted mentally, physically and spirit-wise. It was the same dose of real-life feelings I got recently. Funny it's all coming back. By then, the alcohol was slowly subsiding within but the feeling of sleep was creeping in its stead.

Then I remembered..It was Sunday. I had duties. I called on BW and his friend Usher (name lifted from the artist's hit single with Alicia Keys) if it's alright for me to take a sidetrip for just a tad few minutes just so i can head off to a temple. They replied in the affirmative--though it sounded a bit gibber-gabberly guttural.

Upon arriving at the Temple, I was surprised Usher offered to join me in. He said it's his first time to be in one. Sure I said. After I did my thing, I waited. Waited for Usher whom I earlier suspected was really dozing off in the kneeling pad seeing him there for kneeling for quite some time now.

After the temple, I headed off to the breakfast place. I again asked BW whether he'd like to come down and get some hot foodstuff in him to help ease out wotever drunken state he's in. Again he refused whilst in semi-sleep state. He said, "you go ahead" or something to that effect. So usher and myself had breakfast.

Over the quickest breakfast I've ever had there, my thoughts were somewhere, or they were really intended to be somewhere to drown off Usher's continuous raving of "i love this place, this is beautiful!, i'm coming back to this place!, and the i love the food!" bit.

I never doubted for 1 second that he'll never find that resto ever again without help seeing the state he's in when he went in.

Driving home, I felt even more sleepy. Alcohol and Sleep were like in their midlevels in a dangerous rendezvous inside me. I always believed that when the alcohol level inside your system is high, you're just giddy, you smily sheepishly, you say the darnedest things..but after the alcohol diminishes, sleep comes in. But then again, there's a halfway rendezvous when those two meet. That's wot I was having at the moment whilst driving ourselves home.

Reaching Luna street like a stone's throw from where BW lives, came the worst event that could ever come to my mind..

it took a split second..

or maybe three seconds..

then a loud THUD and CRASH that was so evident that even the half-asleep BW and USHER woke up and said SH$%T!!! in unison.

I bumped on a car's rear that was PARKED on the side of the narrow Luna St.

A PARKED CAR FOR CRYIN' OUT LOUD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I froze a bit. My eyes wide in shock.

This was my first vehicular accident.

The fear that crept within me was unlike any other.

Is this really how people involved in accidents truly feel?

In my state, I said that any moment now I could practically doze off. After dropping the two off, I said to BW to go back and talk to the owner of the car since they're just neighbors, chances are they know one another, and then ask how much he/she needs to have that rear end fixed and that i'll pay for everything necessary.

Then I drove off, without a license. Since I left it with the cop that came by. BW retorted I can't drive myself home because I don't have a license.

I think i said F$%^K the license.

On my way home I heard something being dragged and clacking somewhere in front of me. Prior to reaching to Roxas Blvd., I stopped and checked wots making the ruckus. Egads! My left headlight was smashed to smithereens, my bumper dangled and was being grinded on the road, my hood dislocated and arched inwards.. Man, this is SOooo like total damage in my book.



Upon reaching home. My heart suddenly echoed more fears. I was afraid all of a sudden. I called BW up to check, after 4 times of "cannot be reached" moments, my fears became more apparent. I can't simply sleep.

Shouldn't I have left the car there for investigation?

Shouldn't I have been around for possible statements?

Will this not aggravate the situation?

The worst possible scenarios came when I thought wot if I hit on something else than a car's rear end? That street of BW's is known for many vendors, many passersby, and many vehicles on the half portion of the one way street.

After a few more tries on BW's phone, I felt sleep coming in. I'm so tired I had to give in. In my half state, I felt an instinct to call.

And it was the STUPID-est thing I have ever done now that i'm sobered up.

I called Royal.

Three times even.

He didn't want to answer of course, I forgot all bout the setup. I shouldn't have called. I was never thinking straight that time.

I dozed off with the mobile phone doing some irridiscent sms message.

When i woke up a few moments later I checked the mobile. I saw a draft message of wot I was SUPPOSED to send. It was again for Royal. It involved something lke informing him there was an accident and that if he can go check on BW whether things are okay and stuff... to that effect but not nearly, because it was typed like the sender was a man frothing at the mouth sides--a total madman. The words were scrambled and the spelling all haywired.

I was overly grateful that didn't get sent. It would've been the perfect cherry to Royal's wry humor dessert lately, it would have been the fodder to feed his fiery fun, and it would have been for me--the salt mine dump on some fresh cuts to the flesh. I don't think I need to be the butt-end of a joke for the time being nor be a star in one of Bollywood's greatest collaboration cum connivance plots in history..

Posted by Lost Wandering Soul :: 1:47 PM :: 0 Comments:

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